Management Trainee- "Get Plenty of Sleep Before Training"

Its the first of the month and you are getting your outlook together so you can start scheduling meetings with your clients. "YES!"...wrong answer...its more like looking at a spreadsheet of the date and time someone is going to take a dump on your face. In the midst of scheduling these calls you get an appointment from your human resources director...could it be...no it's too earlier...HOLY SHIT TRAINING! It is safe to say that most of the time the word "training" entails that you will going through a shitty experience. Think about it: training to be a server=nightmare, training someone to be a server=awful, training wheels=embarrasing...my point: training usually involves you feeling dumb and akward. Have no worries...corporate training is the opposite. Training in the corporate world usually means one thing: getting super-hammered because all you have to do is show-up to work and "actively" participate. Also think about how conducive the training room is for a hangover: dim lights, endless amounts of free water, "breaks" to use the bathroom, usually office lunch, and if you're lucky you will get a time called "brainstorming" where you get to write down your ideas. Instead of brainstorming you can sit there with your pen, paper, and water with a introspective look on your face when you are really thinking, "I don't remember taco bell", "i can't believe I told that girl she was beautiful via text." "If I had to marry one girl from a movie would it be drew barrymore from wedding singer or eva mendez from Hitch", "people who drink starbuks (spelled wrong on purpose) f-ing suck."
Overall I think you will find that your business training sessions end up being a relaxing and some what enjoyable experience. Plus, most people in the room are probably hungover too unless they are super ambitious about their career and in that case Im glad they weren't at the same bar as I was.

So when your HR manager tells you to get plenty of sleep before training...just remember what the trainee told you. You're HR manager is planning on drinking that night too.